Stay In Relationship

If you’ve ever had the joy of having a ride-or-die friend, you know the more time we spend with someone, the more stuff we go through together, the more closely knit we become. The same is true of God. The more we hang out with him, the better we know him and the more we want to keep hanging out.

Matthew, Mark, and Luke all tell the story of a conversation Jesus and his disciples had as they came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, an area known for pagan rituals, worshiping other gods, and even child sacrifice. We can imagine the disciples walking in step with Jesus, the road stretching before them. Over the previous months they’d looked on in awe as Jesus performed miracle after miracle. They’d listened in wonder to his parables about the kingdom of God and had their world turned upside down as he encouraged the weak, grieving, timid, merciful, and persecuted that they were the ones who were blessed. Then, Jesus had divided them into pairs and sent them out with enough spiritual power and authority to heal diseases and deal with any evil opposition they might encounter. Now they were back. Reunited on the dusty roads in the foothills of Caesarea Philippi, Jesus asks them a direct question, apparently without a word of preamble or warning: “Who do the crowds say I am?” (Luke 9:18).

The disciples’ answer seems remarkably casual, as if Jesus had asked them who everyone thinks the next James Bond will be. “Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, that one of the prophets of long ago has come back to life” (v. 19).

Jesus’s next question must have cut the atmosphere with a knife. Did he pause, letting the dust settle at his feet before continuing? Did he raise an eyebrow at their apparent disinterest? We’ll never know, but the big, fat, juicy “BUT” he continues with tells us another answer mattered far more.

“BUT what about you?” he asked. “Who do YOU say I am?” (v. 20, emphasis mine).

In this easy-to-miss three-letter word, Luke seems to imply Jesus wasn’t that interested in the crowds’ views but was utterly focused on what his closest friends-the guys he’d be leaving in charge of his ministry-thought. What did they think?

Jesus didn’t ask, “Do you understand what I’m doing?” or “Do you agree with me?” or even “Do you trust me?”

As far as I can tell from reading the Gospels, Jesus never asked his disciples or any of us to agree, be certain, or understand. Instead, he encouraged them-and in turn us-to ask who we think he is, to believe in him, and to be in relationship with him.

For many of us, believing followed understanding. We heard the gospel message, saw our own sinful, yucky side and lack of a way to save ourselves, and understood the equation of Jesus taking our place on the cross. Only then did we say yes to the outrageous grace and mercy of the transaction. We wanted Jesus to take the wheel and steer the train wreck of our lives so we could enjoy the peace, abundant life, and love that came free with our simple yes.

We weren’t believers until we were. With a simple yes, we arrived. Our job now was to stay there. To become more like Jesus and, in turn, more certain of what we believe.

Niki Hardy appears on LIFE TODAY this Tuesday. Excerpted from God, Can We Chat? by Niki Hardy. Copyright ©2025 by Niki Hardy. Published by Revell, a division of Baker Publishing Group. Used by permission.